Author Anonymous: A True Story by E.K. Blair

Author:E.K. Blair [Blair, E.K.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: novel
Publisher: E.K. Blair LLC
Published: 2016-08-27T04:00:00+00:00

When did I lose my heart?

When did my blood go cold?

I kissed my husband goodbye this morning. I told him I loved him.

And when he left, I pulled out the bra and panty set I bought yesterday along with my disposable phone.

I now stand outside the entrance to Alec’s building. My hair whips in the gusting wind as snow swirls like dust along the sidewalk. People walk past me from every direction, but I remain still. I wonder if any of them know what I’m about to do. Can they see the disgrace on me?

I look up, wondering which window is his, wondering if he’s watching me.

I don’t need anyone to tell me what an awful woman I am; I already know. But if there’s one person that can erase the world around me, it’s Alec. With him, I’m free. With him, nothing else exists.

My feet move, taking me through the doors and leading me to the bank of elevators. I step inside and press my finger against the button to illuminate number five, and when I reach the floor and the doors open, I hesitate.

I want this. I know I do. I’ve thought about what this would be like since that very first week. The fantasy has even crept its way into my dreams a few times, but suddenly, I’m terrified. I don’t know what I’m getting into. These are uncharted waters I’m embarking on, and I’m scared shitless.

The elevator doors close before I step off, and I’m being taken back down to the lobby.

Maybe this is a sign.

When the doors open again, I walk out and over to a bench by the large windows. The people are still moving about outside. The snow is still falling. Nothing has changed, and here I remain even though I’ve been craving change, craving something new. Alec is my new. But I’m not a risk-taker. I’m not someone who walks into a situation blindly.

My stomach churns with monumental anxiety.

Walk out of here. Go home and find your adrenaline rush elsewhere.

Don’t listen to her. Your adrenaline rush is waiting for you on the fifth floor. Go.

He’s not the rush you need. He’s the rush that will annihilate you.

He’s the rush that will awaken you. He might even save you from a life of unfulfilled fantasies.

“What are you doing?”

I turn to Alec who’s sitting on the bench with me. I didn’t even realize how deep in my head I just was to not even sense him sitting next to me.

“Are you okay?”

I nod slowly—nervously.

He takes my one hand in the both of his. “Tell me what you’re afraid of.”

“You,” I respond through the cords of my constricted throat, and when I look at our hands, I notice mine are trembling. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” His voice remains gentle, yet so self-assured. “Do you want to leave?”

Yes.

“No.”

He stands with the slightest hint of a smile while still holding my hand, and as I look into his eyes, I leave my world behind, stand, and walk with him.

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